so much to be grateful for.
sometimes it’s hard to see it. like, really hard. how can you find something to be grateful for when it seems like people are falling apart around you, when you watch people hurt and feel yourself hurt with them, when so much seems to be going wrong in your life and in the lives of those you love?? when that’s all you can see, how do you find something to be thankful for? it can be so so hard.
but one thing God has been teaching me is that i just need to look up. i need to look up because when i do- when i gaze into His face- the things around me fall away a bit. sure, they’re still bad and painful and heart wrenching but they don’t seem like the only thing in the picture anymore. and when they’re not the only thing in the picture, there’s suddenly something to be thankful for. even if it’s just being thankful you woke up this morning, or being thankful for the way your breath looks in the crisp, cold air, or being thankful that you had breakfast. even if it’s just that, there is always something to be grateful for.
‘give thanks to the Lord, for He is good. His love endures forever (even when it’s hard to see).’ Psalm 136:1 brackets added by me
you were made to take up space.
you. were. made. to. take. up. space.
you are completely worthy of love.
you are so much more beautiful than you know.
you have purpose and God has a plan for your life.
your opinions matter.
you might feel alone, but really you are not.
you are not a waste of anyone’s time.
i really want these truths to sink in for you, friend. i really want you to know them and to believe them.
see, i believe without a shadow of doubt that there is a God who loves you and me. He loves us and He created us and He filled us with intention and purpose and passion. we weren’t a mistake. we are not a failed attempt. no, God knew exactly what He was doing when He created us… He knew exactly what He was doing when he created YOU. He calls you precious, chosen, child, LOVED.
so read those truths at the top again and believe them, friend. you are loved, you are known and you were made to take up space in this world. and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
It’s really hard feeling not good enough. Like you don’t tick all the boxes; like you’re not cool enough… smart enough… pretty enough.
It’s really hard feeling lonely. Like something is wrong with you and that’s why you don’t have anyone to talk to in class. It’s hard wondering why you don’t have as many friends as her.
It’s really hard feeling anxious. Like you have a million worries flying around in your head and none of them will go away. Feeling restless, scared, nervous.
It’s really hard feeling ugly. Like everyone else is perfect and beautiful and you’re… not. Like you’re too big here or too small there and like you have too little fat and too much hair.
It’s really hard feeling like you can’t keep going. Feeling like you can hardly get up each morning knowing that today will likely be as hard as yesterday. Struggling to fake a smile so your parents don’t worry and to hold back the tears as you leave the house so no one notices.
Dear, precious girl, I know that life can be so hard sometimes. Maybe I don’t even know quite how hard. But I do know this: we have a Father in Heaven who knows EXACTLY how hard what you’re going through is and EXACTLY how you’re feeling. So just remember this: even when you feel like no one around you understands, Jesus looks at you and understands completely. And despite all of what He sees, He still calls you priceless.
All You Ever Did
‘All you ever did was love,
All you did was give yourself to make a place for me,
All you ever wanted was my heart,
My heart, my heart.’
– All You Ever Did, Kandi Peterson
A few days ago as I listened to this song, I wrote this in my journal:
Jesus, you didn’t know if we’d ever love you back. You didn’t know if we’d ever want you or if instead we’d spend our whole lives running from you, chasing after a life we could never really have because it wasn’t really real. But still you hung up on that cross. Bit by bit, the life drained out of you as you died a death that you did not- could not- deserve. You could’ve gotten down from that cross. You could have ended the pain in a heartbeat. But you didn’t. You didn’t because you love us. Because you love us, you stayed up on that cross. You gave yourself so that one day we could be with you forever… if we even chose to love you in the first place. All you ever wanted was our hearts. There were no expectations, no conditions. We don’t have to clean ourselves up before we come to you. We’re messy, but that’s okay, because all you want is our hearts. Just as we are, you just want our hearts. And just like the sun doesn’t cease to shine, your love doesn’t cease. It doesn’t fade, it doesn’t diminish. It is endless, it limitless, it is wide. Your love doesn’t change. You will keep on loving us. No matter how many times we turn away. No matter how many times we fail. No matter how many times we mess up, no matter how many times we run, YOU WILL KEEP ON LOVING US. This is not make believe, this is how you love us, how you have always loved us. Jesus, all you ever did was love.
(Based on the lyrics of All You Ever Did by Kandi Peterson)
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